by popular demand...

It has been brought to my attention that "The Fool's Progress" is suffering from a lack of author photos. So...here are a few prime shots from a little sayonara party we had last weekend. My friend Pete is going back to Australia to start med school, so in honor of that we decided to kill a few brain cells (he won't really be needing those in med school anyway, will he?) There seems to be a recurring theme with me in the photos...I think I had decided that in order to avoid making what my dear friend Kitty affectionately calls "duck face" in the photos, I should open my mouth as wide as possible. I can't tell if the experiment was a raging success or huge failure...

This is me, the future Dr. Pete, and my friend Jess. We're bringin' the peace sign back (note: Justin Timberlake reference)

I call this one "Ode to Britney" (gum, gaping mouth)

The sign of a good party? Accordians, of course....

Jingle Bells never sounded so good...

Thanks to Mr. Shone (AKA accordian player number2) for the pics!

declarations of love

The level of my pedagogical prowess has reached an all time high. Today in the hall between classes, one of my students said to me (this is a direct quote): "I was born to love you." Well obviously, after he said it I was in complete shock...I mean, he used the passive tense and everything!! And I refuse to believe that he heard the line in some crappy J-pop song...

Anyway, here's a picture of the aforementioned student (second from the right) I've suspected for a while that he has a crush on me...he always tells me that I have "nice hair" when I see him in the hall.

And here are a few more shots of my students just for fun. I am making my English bulletin board for this month...little do these students know that I have taken advantage of their narcissism in mugging for the camera so that I can secretly plaster their faces up in the hallway for the amusement of the rest of the school. This one is especially funny since I took it in the staff room and just as I was about to take the photo, out of nowhere the music teacher leapt over her desk and several trash cans to get in the shot.

Here are some 1st graders...way too cute! Today in class we wrote Christmas cards to teachers and friends. The kid on the far left wrote a card to his friend (the student standing next to him). This was his Xmas wish: "Dear Bob (friend's nickname), I enjoy your stomach. Merry Christmas!"

Thanksgiving!

Well, it looks like Thanksgiving 2006 has come and gone, and for the second year in a row I have managed to avoid the eat-a-thon that usually occurs at this time every year. I'm not sure what it is about Thanksgiving, but it always seems to inspire some type of overindulgance regardless of my location on the map. Last year was a "wine-a-thon" and this year was "sushi-a-thon". In lieu of the traditional turkey and stuffing, this year I went for top of the line sushi at a little place here in Nonoichi. One of the teachers that I work with thought it would be fun to take me to an expensive sushi shop (as opposed to the ol' stand-by conveyor belt sushi, or kaiten sushi, favored among those of us with a less discerning palate for quality sushi...and also because it's cheap) so after work a few Japanese teachers and I met up at a unbelievably tiny little sushi shop. We all crammed ourselves into our seats at the counter, which is nice since you get to see the sushi chef in action and you can also see the wide array of strange fish behind the glass on the counter top (some of which was still moving, by the way) The owner/chef is a big soccer fan and likes to travel around the world to see soccer matches, so his english was perfect. He seemed to take great joy in pulling out all the most horrific looking sea creatures to explain what exactly I was about to eat....to be honest, on most occasions I think I would have enjoyed some of the food more had I not known what it looked like in its previous life...

As the sushi stared flowing, so too did the beer. It's always interesting to talk to the teachers outside of the school setting to get their real opinions about things. I got to hear all the juicy gossip about the other teachers and the principal, and during the course of the gossip session we got onto the topic of obscene words, which, in my opinion, are the most valuable words to know when learning a foreign language. By the end of the night, all the teachers and I were calling each other "assholes" and discussing the socio-linguistic differences between the phrases "take a dump" and "bowel movement". At one point, in the heat of discussion, I accidentally screamed out "unko" (the Japanese word for "shit") which gave all the other patrons in the restaurant quite a laugh. Now that's what I call internationalization....

Here are a few pics of the more interesting things on the menu:

sea cucumber (in its natual habitat)...very crunchy...

fermented squid intestines....salty

awabi (in english "abalone"...since I had no idea what this was in neither Japanese nor English, here's a definition: Any of various large edible marine gastropods of the genus Haliotis, having an ear-shaped shell with a row of holes along the outer edge. The colorful pearly interior of the shell is often used for making ornaments. Also called ear shell) I was told that this is one of the most expensive delicacies at high end sushi shops. Because I had never tried it before, the sushi chef gave us a free sample....I'll only say that it tasted about as good as it looks. I'll let you draw your own conclusions...

This is "anko", sweet bean paste found in many desserts here in Japan. We didn't eat this at the sushi restaurant, but if you'll notice the word anko is quite similar to the word unko (mentioned in the post above). It seems they share more than just a morphological similarity...

Are you jonile tonight?

Here's a little something I picked up from the grocery store yesterday. As I was browsing through the tofu aisle (yes, here they have an entire aisle dedicated to tofu of various forms in all its bland glory) and I stumbled upon this little snack. For all those heartbroken and adrift lovers out there, you can now soothe your heartache with "Are you jonile tonight?" tofu in a convenient to-go container. I'll admit that I immediately threw one into my shopping basket for the sole purpose of posting a picture of it on this here blog-thingy....but despite all the clever little jokes and giggling that occurred at the tofu's expense, I have to say that it might just be the best damn tofu I have ever eaten! So smooth! So creamy! How they could create something so delicious out of soy I'll never know....I may be "jonile" tonight, but at least my taste-buds will go to bed satisfied....

ii nioi!

I have a student who likes to smell me. It started a few weeks ago; at first I thought it would just be an isolated incident, but I now see that it has become a regular part of my classes with her. Let me explain...the student is an 1st grader (I guess that would be 6th grade back home) and she's a bit crazy and over-zealous when it comes to English class. Don't get me wrong, it's a refreshing change from the days when I would ask a question like "how are you today?" and the only response would be a few yawns and dead-eyed stares. Anyway, this student looooooves English class. When she sees me walk in to the classroom, she starts squirming and jumping in her seat and waving at me before the class even begins.

Anyway, so a few weeks ago during class, as I was passing out papers for an activity, I handed her a paper and as I was turning to walk away, she grabbed my arm and very forcefully pulled me back. She then pulled me down towards her and screamed excitedly to her friend "ii nioi!!" (nice smell!) I was able to pry her hands away and moved on to the other side of the room. I am not quite sure what exactly she was smelling...was it my Secret deodorant with the new, refreshing "lavender splash" scent? Or maybe my fabric softner? My hypothesis is that she thinks I have a particular "foreigner" scent which she really enjoys. Well, whatever the reason, she thinks I smell good and now makes a point of smelling me every time we have class. Sometimes she doesn't remember to do it right away, and just when I think "good, she's finally grown out of that phase!" I see the lightbulb go on in her head as she thinks to herself "I need to smell the English teacher today!"...when that happens, there's nothing I can do but walk over to her desk and let her nose have its way with me...

Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures of the student who smells me, but I've included some from our school's annual sports festival. These things are amazing! Every September, every school in Japan has an all day festival in which the students are divided into teams and made to participate in a number of ridiculous, arbitrary, and slightly dangerous games. Inevitably the sports festival is held on an extremely hot day (so hot that by 9:00 a.m. my shirt and my pants were completely soaked through with sweat) The day wouldn't be complete without at least 2 or 3 students passing out from the heat and exhaustion. Hooray for sports day!

Leg-tie game: Tie four students together at the feet. Make them run across the field. Let the fun begin!

Stipper pole race: (OK, so it's not really a stripper pole) Four students hold the pole. Race down the field and around a cone. Race back to starting position.

3rd grade boys on the blue team. I made myself an honorary member of the blue team, altough I was told to remain impartial as to avoid upsetting members of the opposing teams...but what can I say, the blue team was closer to the shade...

All the students wanted to try on my cool sunglasses...

Crazy girls from the badminton club:

Team cheer

What's for lunch today at school?

Fried whale meat.

España Part 2: El Camino

So now that you know a little history about el camino, I’ll explain a bit more about our journey. We started out from a little town called Sarria, which is about 120 km from Santiago. After a 12 hour bus trip from San Sebastian we arrived in Sarria. One of the coolest things about the pilgrim's route is that it is marked with yellow arrows leading the way. So immediately after walking out of the bus station we saw our first yellow arrow leading us to the trail. At this point both Jill and I started getting excited (both of us daydreaming, perhaps, of our sun burnt and road-weary selves and our heroic yet humble pilgrimage, dramatically arriving in Santiago to the cheers and encouragement of the simple townsfolk…completely full of shit, of course...) So as the sun was setting we headed to our first refuge, almost getting lost within our first 15 minutes of the pilgrimage (even with the arrows…typical), only to find that it was full. We proceeded to ask at every refuge and pensión in town only to find that they, too, were full. Finally, at the last place in town, we convinced a sweet (and possibly senile) old lady to let us stay on the floor in her living room. She made us swear not to tell anyone in town where we were staying and told us to come back after dark so nobody would see us enter the pensión. Apparently, many of the places that house pilgrims get subsidies from the government, so that they can offer cheap accommodation to pilgrims. In turn, the people who run the pensiones must declare all the rooms/number of pilgrims. As we found out, many places have “secret” or undeclared rooms so that they can make a little extra money on the side. Anyway, we got to stay in one of the secret rooms, but once inside we weren’t allowed to turn on the lights or open the window…as I said before, the little old lady was a little crazy (she also made us hide our backpacks inside the pantry in the kitchen…in case of a middle-of-the-night raid, perhaps?)

The next morning we officially started our pilgrimage. I, being the procrastinator that I am, had done a last minute packing job before I left Japan, so any supplies and equipment that I had were all bought at the 100 yen store the day before I left. Using only the small, detachable travel backpack part of my larger backpack and wearing my worn out old running shoes, I was taking the minimalist approach. Jill, on the other hand, had spent weeks (if not months) making multiple trips to REI and doing research on the internet about packing lists, etc. So of course Jill had prepared everything down to the last, minute detail, and was carrying a large, brand new, state of the art backpack filled with the latest “moisture wicking” clothing technology and wearing top of the line hiking shoes; quite the contrast to my approach! While I openly mocked Jill for being fooled by the marketing ploys and hi-tech descriptions, I was secretly envious of much of the gear and kicking myself for my lack of preparation. Anyway, I was determined to prove that I could fare just as well with no gear…minimalist vs. western excess, the ultimate challenge!

So how does the challenge end, you may be asking yourselves? Well, in the end, the pilgrimage kicked both of our asses, gear or no gear. After day 1 of the journey, having walked about 22 or 23 km, we arrived in Portomarín with swollen and blistered feet, aching backs, and sufficiently humbled. Touché, el camino, touché…

Jill, draining the blood from her feet...Pilgrim climbing the stairs to Portomarín

España! Part 1

Well, for those of you that might not know, I have just spent the last (almost!) month in beloved España for summer vacation. You may be asking yourselves “why, if she lives in Japan, did Katie go all the way to Spain for a vacation?” I agree, it would have made more sense to either a) go home and visit the family or b) travel somewhere exotic in Southeast Asia (since that is one of the major reasons why I am in Japan in the first place!)

To explain, let me first say that these plans for a “Spanish reunion” were made almost 4 years ago. While living in Spain, Jill and I crammed in our fair share of adventures and road trips, but there was one that we couldn’t quite find the time or money to do, which was walking the millennia old pilgrim’s trail across the North of Spain called “el camino de Santiago de Compostela” (or “the way of St. James). So we promised ourselves that, no matter what, we would go back and do it before we turned 30. At the time the “age 30” deadline seemed like a comically far-off point…however as life and grad school kind of got in the way, we found ourselves knocking on 30’s door. Anyway, the time was right, so it just so happened that I am living at possibly the farthest point on the map from Spain (OK, so maybe not, but it sure as hell seemed like it during my 48 HOUR journey to get there….I won’t even mention my layover in Qatar (yeah, look it up on the map, I had to…) which is a whole ‘nother blog entry in itself).

Anyway, so back to the reason why we went in the first place: el camino. To give a little background about the pilgrimage, here’s a little something I found on Wikipedia (so you know it’s all completely accurate and from a credible source…)

The Way of St James has been one of the most important Christian pilgrimages since medieval times and it has existed for over 1000 years. It was considered one of three pilgrimages on which all sins could be forgiven - the others being the Via Francigena to Rome and the pilgrimage to Jerusalem.

There is not a single route - the Way can be one of any number of pilgrimage routes to Santiago de Compostela. However a few of the routes are considered main ones. Santiago is such an important pilgrimage destination as it is considered the burial site of the apostle James the Great. Legend states that St. James' remains were carried by boat from Jerusalem to northern Spain where they were buried on the site of what is now the city of Santiago de Compostela. In the middle ages the route was highly traveled. However, the Protestant Reformation and political unrest in 16th century Europe resulted in its decline. In the early 1980s only a few pilgrims arrived in Santiago annually. However, since the late 1980s the way has attracted a growing number of modern-day pilgrims from all around the globe. The route was declared the first European Cultural Route by the Council of Europe in October 1987 and inscribed as one of UNESCO's World Heritage Sites in 1993.

The earliest records of visits paid to the shrine dedicated to St James at Santiago de Compostela date from the 8th century, in the times of the Kingdom of Asturias. This was the most renowned medieval pilgrimage; and the custom of those who carried back with them from Galicia scallop shells as proof of their journey gradually extended to other forms of pilgrimage.

The earliest recorded pilgrims from beyond the Pyrenees had visited the shrine in the middle of the 10th century, but it seem that it was not until a century later that pilgrims from abroad were regularly journeying there in large numbers, even the first recorded pilgrims from England, between 1092 and 1105. By the early 12th century the pilgrimage was a highly organized affair. Four established pilgrimage routes from starting points in France converged in the Basque country of the western Pyrenees. From there a single combined track crossed northern Spain, linking Burgos, Carrión de los Condes, Sahagún, León, Astorga and Lugo

In Spain and southern France pilgrim's hostels dot the common routes providing overnight accommodation for recognised pilgrims, i.e. whoever who holds a credencial. In Spain this type of accommodation is called a refugio or an albergue. The style of accommodation is somewhat similar to those provided by youth hostels, or the French system of Gîtes d'étape; beds are in dormitories and usually cost between 3 and 7 Euros per night, though a few are by donation only. Pilgrims are usually limited to one night's accommodation.

Sometimes these hostels are run by the local parish, sometimes by the local council, and sometimes they are privately owned or run by pilgrim's associations. Occasionally these refugios are located in monasteries, such as the one in Samos, and run by the monks.

Pilgrims arriving in Santiago de Compostela who have walked at least the last 100km, or cycled 200km to get there (as indicated on their credencial) are eligible for a certificate called the Compostela from the Pilgrim's Office in Santiago.

Many people choose to do the pilgrimage in various sections, usually for one-week segments. Others choose to walk only the last 100 km (which is what we did), and the truly dedicated walk the entire route starting in France and ending up in Santiago (this takes about 1 month of walking to complete the entire 1250 km) In general, most pilgrims choose to do the route for religious reasons. The minority of the walkers go for other reasons (spiritual, for sport, adventure travel, etc.) Obviously neither Jill nor I were there for religious purposes, but we’d like to think that the journey was somewhat spiritual in nature….

Anyway, so now you have the background about el camino and the major motivation behind our trip…and this particular blog entry has exhausted me! So here’s a few pictures from our first few days in Spain before we started our pilgrimage:

This is from the international festival in Santander where we saw this amazing ballet. It was choreograhped and perfomed to the music of Pink Floyd! And the best part? The perfomance was done by a ballet company from Tokyo! Very impressive...and we even managed to sweet talk our way in without tickets so it was free!

Jill and Cheese: A Love Story

Me and the finest drink ever created: Biofrutas (OK, so they changed the name to "Funciona" but that just sounds stupid)

statue of Christ on the hill with paraglider in San Sebastian

that pretty much sums it up...

church facade in San Sebastian

OK, so stay tuned for my next post about the pilgrimage and the rest of the journey!

Out of the office....

So in a few hours I will be embarking on my big pilgrimmage to Spain!! Wow, can't belive it's been 5 years since I last visited....Anyway, I thought I would do one last update before I left (I couldn't leave all my fans hanging for an entire month, now could I?) These are just some shots of the 'hood I took the other evening. This first one is a little shrine next to the river behind my apartment:
This is a street behind my apartment:
the river:
scarecrow in the middle of a rice paddy: more scarecrows:
the whole paddy was full of them...a scarecrow exhibit, perhaps?

Pimptastic!

So it's natsu yasumi around here (that's "summer vacation" for all you monolinguals out there) and where I come from, summer vacation from school means 2 and 1/2 months of complete hibernation of all critical thinking and intelligent thoughts. In Japan, on the other hand, it seems that it's businsess as usual even during summer vacations. Teachers as well as students still come to school every day. Granted the atmosphere is much more relaxed and there are no classes, but the mere fact that we are required to come to school at all is almost too much for my educated-within-the-American-school-system brain to comprehend. Just yesterday there was quite the upheaval in the staffroom because of the behavior of one of the students and his small act of summer vacation-induced rebellion. The student was brought into the staffroom, where he was promptly surrounded by at least 5 or 6 teachers (during the course of this episode, at least 3 other teachers came in to join the fun) and yelled at in turn by all of them. Seeing how this was the most exciting part of my day, I listened intently for an clue as to what henious crime this student had committed. Since I couldn't really understand anything being said, I had to rely on my powers of deduction. After about 30 minutes of yelling and interrogation, I was convinced that the student had either stolen something, vandalized something, gotten drunk after raiding mom and dad's liquor cabinet, or maybe all three. From my jr. high and high school experiences, these seemed the most logical assumptions about what would warrant this type of ass-chewing. After all the teachers had thoroughly exhausted themselves from yelling, the student was sent out of the staffroom. I then asked one of the Japanese English teachers that I work with what had happened. In the end, all of my theories were completely wrong. The real crime? The student showed up to school without wearing his school uniform and attempted to eat an ice cream cone inside one of the classrooms (the contriband cone is still being held inside the evidence locker AKA the staffroom freezer) While not the outrageous display of teenage rebellion I had imagined, I guess for a Japanese jr. high school student, it's pretty ballsy behavior. He might just be my new favorite student...

Anyway, what does any of this have to do with the title of my post? Well, since I have been sitting here all week with nothing to do except sweat profusely, google chat, and search for things on the internet, I have found all sorts of interesting things to keep me busy. So today I spent a good 15 to 20 minutes on the website http://www.white-wolf.com/pimp/index.php?line=generator creating my new "pimp" name. I highly recommend this site....and here, in no particular order, are some of the highlights:

Bamboo Chute Katie Flowin' (I thought this one appropriate given my current location)

Tricky Mc Clintic Sweetness

Whiskey Lips Mc Clintic Super Suede

Fine Ass Mc Clintic W. Bushmaster

Uncle Katie White Chocolate

Super Suede Mary Stud

Warts K. G-Man

Skillz Katie Tricky

Maestro K. Snake Eyes

Homeboy Mc Clintic Devious

Vicious Mary Macktastic

Kicks K. Loco

Macktastic Katie Superfly

Short Katie Rothstein

Kitty: a dedication (part 2)

As a continuation of "Kitty Appreciation Week", I wanted to include a shot of Kitty without the headgear. Make no mistake...viking horns are going to be THE fashion accessory of the season...but Kitty still looks hot without them.

Kitty: a dedication

I just wanted to give a shout-out to my number one blog fan. Without the support of dedicated readers like Kitty, the zeigeist that is "The Fool's Progress" would not be what it is today. I salute you...

Biya Gahden

Last Friday my friends and I were invited to go to a beer garden. We were all interviewed for a local college radio program that features foreigners that live in the area. In appreciation the host of the show, Roy, had the party for us (that's him in the center). As is typical of most drinking parties here, there was waaaay too much food. We also had the party on what I swear was the hottest and most humid night of the year. Yes, there's nothing like sitting outside dripping with sweat as you try to eat your weight it little appetizers. However the cold beer kept things tolerable... After we finished at the beer garden, we decided to do a little karaoke. One of the women who volunteers at the radio station with Roy informed us that he was a Japanese pop star in the 60's! Apparently Roy was in a "boy band" and was quite the heartthrob in his day! As a special treat, Roy sang one of his biggest hits for us at the karaoke place. I closed the evening of beer and karaoke by singing a (pathetic) rendition of "Afternoon Delight" by the Starlight Vocal Band. I thought it would be an amusing crowd-pleaser...but I was wrong. I guess without the irony it's not as funny. Lesson learned for the future...

Where I'm at...

In just a few days I will celebrate my one year anniversary in Japan...so I thought this might be a good time to point out where I have been for the last year! Japan is divided into prefectures, which are kind of like states. I live in Ishikawa prefecture on the Sea of Japan coast. The capital is Kanazawa City and my town, Nonoichi, is basically an extension of Kanazawa. Yes, my friends, I live in suburbia... For all you geographically challenged individuals out there, I have included a map so you can get a visual of my location in relation to the rest of Japan.
Even though my town is quite small, I unfortunately live about as far away from my schools as possible without living in another town. This wasn't a problem...until I got my bike stolen from the local train station about a month ago which, incidentally, was not my fault. I was lulled into a false sense of secturity by the low crime rate here and therefore didn't lock my bike at the station...and left it there overnight. Little did I know that just below the wholesome surface of Nonoichi lies the bubbling underbelly of a crime syndicate filled with bike thieves and shoplifters. But I digress. Here's a shot of the local bus in Nonoichi (called the "Noti") that I now take to school in the morning:
So cute! Kawaiiiiiiii!!! They come in 3 cute colors and have their own cute little cartoon mascot (like most everything in Japan...must...have...cartoon...mascot...!) My students think it's hilarious that I ride the Noti. I don't see what's so funny, but maybe it's some sort of inside joke that I'm not getting? Anyway, they all stare into the bus window as it passes and if they see me on it they wave and laugh hysterically. Just don't get it...

The supermarket

Going to the supermarket is always an adventure here. Usually I try to refrain from taking pictures of all the strange (and sometimes revolting) things that I see for fear of looking like a dumb "gaijin". For some reason, though, I couldn't resist taking a picture of the giant fish head on display...

And so it begins...

Just felt the need to share a picture of my new drinking glasses. I always thought to myself "wow, that person has lived in Japan waaaaay too long" when I would meet other foreigners with an apartment/car/purse/etc. over-loaded with cute cartoon animals. Fast forward 11 months and I find myself in the 100 yen store overjoyed with my new "kawaiiiiiiiiiiii" purchased glasses. To understand how a completely rational adult could be overcome with joy by the sight of cute cartoon animals on juice glasses (which I plan on going back to buy the complete set), I must first explain the obsession with "kawaii" (cute). Everything here is "kawaii". If there ever were a more overused adjective in the entire Japanese language, nay world, it might very well be "kawaii". My students tell me how "kawaii" I am at least 10 times in each class, I hear it as I walk down the hall between classes, I hear it before school, I hear it walking to school, I hear it after classes have ended, I even hear students shouting it out the 3rd story windows at me as I leave the school. It was only a matter of time until I, too, began to define the things in my life as either "kawaii" or "not kawaii". I have also provided further evidence of the utter decline of my good taste by including a picture of my cell phone (hot pink, Kitty-chan charms) Laugh now, my friends, but guess what you're all getting next Christmas...

Soooo...now what?

I guess I'll start my life as a blogger with some notes from my students here in Japan. Obviously, I am an amazing teacher....see for youself:

My students are very concerned with the state of my love life...


Cartoon version of me as envisioned by one of my lovely students. Unfortunately, the hair is dead on...damn you, humidity in Japan!